I think accidentally dying my hair so dark is triggering me....

So I've been wanting to put some hi-lights in my hair... lighten it up a bit, add some texture... ya know? But my roots looked like shit so I had to dye full color first.


Now I never get upset when the color comes out wrong, it happens all the time. And I've accidentally dyed my hair black many-a-time... but for some reason this time it's really upsetting me.


And now I have to re-dye it to get a lighter brown before I can even hi-light it.

And underneath where the pink and blue used to be had been a lighter brown just from the fact that it was previously bleached... now my hair is one solid color. Full on black. 


It sucks. 


And I don't know why this is upsetting me so much right now... and of course once one stupid little thing upsets me it makes everything else just come back to me... and now suddenly everything is wrong.

This song reminds me of the boy... 

I feel super gross today...

I miss C and I can't do anything about it...

I have no razors here...

My car is in the shop... there's no air in my bike...

I have no razors...

I can find something...

J's grandma just died and I'm miserable because I don't have a razor handy??
What the fuck is wrong with me?!?

This all started because of some fucking hair dye.

I can't do this anymore.

Fuck.

Just Because

So, I'm home.... as in with the parents. This is my "spring break". I'll be here for a week-10 days. I got a few free trial guest passes at the local gyms so I can go in and work out/take fitness classes for free. That's in addition to the equipment we have in the basement.


I'm finally going to take Zumba! Haha, I've always wanted to but could never fit it in my schedule. I'm going tomorrow morning 9:30-11. I'm actually going to sleep right after this post since I am extremely sleep deprived at the moment. 


I feel super white also, so I'm gonna need to get some cash for tanning. I could really go for a frosted bed tan. Even everything out, get some color on my face.


I'm going to make the best of being home despite the fact J once again hates me. I'm starting to feel like she's looking for reasons to start fights. But whatever, I'm not going to let it phase me. I don't need her or anyone else.


I think I'm going to keep this short since my last post was about a mile long. I'll try to keep updating throughout the week and then once I'm back at school and working! I'm excited but nervous for the fact I only have dance classes twice a week. That is just not acceptable for me. I'm gonna have to work something out and get some extra classes in somehow.


Well anyway, that's it for now. I hope you're all doing well :)

[[I tried to add photos but they won't let me, I'll get them to you tomorrow or sometime this week!]]

New Tattoo?!?

Sorry for the lack of updates, my computer straight up died a few days ago. I should be getting a new one soon... hopefully really soon. Anyway, I'm up (well it's not like I slept I was out until almost 6am) and just about to take a much needed shower due to the smell of some things my parents would not appriciate while under their roof. Haha. I've been sick with a sore throat/cold for a week now though so I really can't smell a thing.

I died my hair some more yesterday, I'll have more pictures to come when I take them but since I was on my way out I don't really have a lot. The colors bled together a little bit so it didn't really come out the way I had planned it but I still love it! I had a few spots that the color missed and were still blonde from the bleaching, but a simple sharpie fixes that perfectly! They really are amazing for touch-ups :)

Oh and yeah, so I got the second tattoo. Haha, what an eventful day :) I absolutely love love love this one!!! 

Step 1: place permanent reminder on my body

Step 2: believe it

I also started writing a 'guide' sort of... about how to love myself. Wow. Who needs a guide for that? But whatever... it stemmed off K telling me to make a list of all the things I love about myself and putting it somewhere I can always see and read it. So anyway, I swear this 'guide' is going to turn into a fucking novel. Once I get some more done and get it typed up (handwritten due to death of my laptop) then I will share it with all of you lovlies <3

Okay, I think it's shower time... I don't have any unscented soap or anything here... but apparently I reek. I'll make due. I feel kind of icky anyway and showers always make people feel better. I just wish I didn't have to wash m hair but I'm sure, of course, most of the stentch is in there.