This is gonna sound so strange but I honestly have such a hard time sometimes knowing if I'm going better or worse... or like... one thing will get better while another gets worse... I dunno.
So anyway, lately, really I think it's been building this entire year- I feel like I've been a lot more suicidal. Well... no. I should say I've been having a lot more suicidal thoughts and urges. I haven't really done much intentionally. But it's like... when it gets bad, it gets bad... and it's building... it's like this thing that's always in the back of my mind. It's always there somewhere and I can't get it out.
I think I'm getting much better at hiding it though...
Whatever.
Anyway... I walked in graduation the other day, but I still don't know if it's official... I still don't know if I passed english -_-
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