I just realized that my actual fear of food didn't come until after treatment. After they made me gain too much weight too fast and way before I was anywhere near mentally ready. I may have gotten skinny, I may have skipped meals, exercised, ate small amounts, ate healthy foods... but I wasn't AFRAID of food.
God, that place fuckin ruined my life. I have nothing against treatment... but this place was just. Ugh. It's the reason I hate hospitals. And I wasn't the only one who had a bad experience there.
From what i've heard most inpatient ED programs in hospitals are like that. They fatten you up and send you out then you do everything humanly possible to lose the weight and it just becomes this vicious cycle.... sucks that they made you afraid of food though *hugs*
ReplyDeleteStill reading your posts, I don't have much to say.
ReplyDeleteHope you feel better soon ♥.
xx