Monday, September 26, 2011

Monday Monday

You are all so sweet! Thank you <3 I'm sorry my posts have been so negative... but I am going to partially blame that on my period (which I got the morning after the last time I cut). Funny thing... I normally end up cutting around my period. And of course get more emotional which usually means depressed.

But I had a pretty good day today (so far). I faced a fear by wearing short sleeves to dance. I always were long, not because of scars, but because of jiggly fat... but I just looked away or closed my eyes when I danced. 

I'm working on things. I do still want to loose some more weight and gain my confidence... but I am also working really hard on doing it in a healthy way and not restricting too much, or at all, but, you know...

Anyway... that's all! Just thought I would give you guys a bit of a less negative post today :)
The suicidal feeling kind of passed... or isn't as strong right now. I think until I am really confident again and enjoying life I will struggle with those thoughts. As long as I'm not acting on them though, I think we're okay.


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